(The CW, Wednesday, 8,00)

I'm going to do something I've not done with my new TV reviews before. I'm not going to grade Gossip Girl. Because maybe you'll like it, maybe you'll hate it, maybe you'll find the fascination that adults over 30 or so have with teens behaving badly interesting, like I do, or something else.

One thing I know for sure, though: you're not going to watch it.

Problem is: Gossip Girl's been given the hardest time-slot in network TV, Wednesday night at 8,00. That's the hour when Criminal Minds comes back to CBS (Criminal Minds is a top 20 show, if you didn't know, and pretty compelling), and the other four networks are premiering new shows that are expected to do quite well. NBC's got Bionic Woman, FOX has Gordon Ramsay feature Kitchen Nightmares and ABC's anchoring it's new Wendesday with it's Grey's spin-off Private Practice.

Which means that unless 1) you're in highschool or 2) you really want to fantasize about getting with Blake Lively (who's 20 now, so it's OK if you do, I promise) or 3) you're one of the aforementioned adults obsessed with either a) the terrible--terrible!--and immoral--immoral!--things these teens are 'doing' (let us not forget these are actors playing roles of fictional characters) or b) watching teens do terrible things, in what Slate describes as "status-porn" (an interesting take on the whole, though somewhat off), that you're not going to watch it. You're going to watch one of the other four probably good shows on at this time.

So I can tell you how stylish and surprisingly enthralling the pilot was. But you don't give a crap, honestly. And there's nothing I could say to change that.

If you love the CW, you'll watch. It's better than many. Worse than some. Whatever.

Amy's Robot's got a review round-up.